This Dating Life: Girlfriend Chronicles

Conversations that I've had with my girlfriend that I probably should have known better about:


While lying in bed peacefully, enjoying a quiet moment together:


"I'm gonna pick like, EIGHTEEN pounds of strawberries tomorrow," I exuberantly exclaimed.


"I was lying here thinking how glad I am that I found you and how happy I am," she said, somewhat disappointedly.


"Me too.  But I'm also just reeeeeeally excited for strawberry picking.  But yea, I like you too a lot."


While discussing my job:


"I got to look at so many cute animals yesterday.  There were puppies and babies, and evil kittens and babies, and puppies and evil kittens, it's ridiculous.  All I do all day is look at adorable animals and half naked women.  Well, usually they're really like, three quarters naked."


"Oh good," she said, though I was pretty certain she didn't actually mean it.

Let's Get a Physical, Physical...

For my first checkup in three years, I chose a female doctor at a practice recommended to me by my boss.  I wavered over this decision, as I've always felt more comfortable discussing symptoms with a male doctor.  My only real experience with female doctors had been on the internet, if you get my drift. I wasn't sure what I was getting myself into, though again, if it was anything like the internet, she wouldn't be the one to say "open your mouth and say ahhh."


It was a pretty good experience, as I found myself easily talking to her and able to trust her, which is an important part of the doctor / patient relationship to me.  She offered to test for many things in my blood, including allergies and something called cholesterol, so that was all a plus.  But what sealed the deal was when she asked me to turn my head and cough.  It's MUCH better to have a female doctor touching your fun parts then a male doc.  My only complaint is I left confused at not getting a happy ending.