This Dating Life: Clear Headed

I recently had a great first date, with a lady from Connecticut.*  We discussed many things, including cookies for dinner, and how her father calls woodchucks "varmints."  It's long been a secret desire of mine to date a relative of Yosemite Sam.  I also proved a theory I've long believed: one drink is just not enough for her to make a mistake.

*historically one of my least favorite states.  CT drivers refuse to use the right lane for any reason, leaving the left and middle lanes to be clogged.  Greenwich has so much money it hurts my soul, and Stamford always has a traffic jam on I-95, for no damned reason.  It needlessly further distances me from loved ones: Were Connecticut to be removed from the map, my trips to Massachusetts would be considerably shorter.  However, they do have some great, rich top soil, and the Hutch is kinda bad-ass.