Rihanna

Dear Rihanna,

You are beautiful. Will you go out with me and buy me a new wardrobe?

Sincerely,
L Bo

Rabbi Darkside

One of the coolest things happened to me because I was late to a Mets game: coming up the escalator at the Jackie Robinson Rotunda, I saw Rabbi Darkside, masterful MC, incredible lyricist, and educator. Thinking I'd just be able to tell him how much I loved his work, I said hi, but we ended up talking for about 30 minutes. A lot of that might be due to my friend Goldiloxx complimenting him on his kicks and such, and being a female. In any case, after a while talking about hip-hop, the Mets, and mutual acquaintances (I put the members of Chronikill on to him), Rabbi D told us about Freestyle Mondays at Sin-Sin Lounge, gave me his business card and told me to email him if I was coming.

On Monday night, I fully expected to show up to a small room with not many people and for this scene to play out:

The show is supposed to start at 10, so Rabbi D is already there with some other rappers, and greets me when I come in....
"Hey Larry thanks for coming. This is my friend Appl Juic. You already know Hired Gun and Farbeon."
Hey guys. HG, sorry I originally under-rated your album. It's on par with Rabbi D's, and spent a lot of time in rotation in my car. It's really nice to meet you, Appl Juic. I love your slightly odd flow and your vocabulary choices. Combined with your British accent, you're one of my favorite rappers!

"Thanks Larry, let me buy you a drink. This is what we call beer in English."

"Larry, I just noticed you have your camera with you and you mentioned you were a photographer when we met. This is Rabbi Darkside talking again, in case you're confused. Did you want to take some portraits of us?"

Sure Rabbi D, that'd be cool.

A little bit later, after shooting portraits and pics of people freestyling....

"Wow Larry I'm so impressed by your work. These photos are crazy good. Say, you're really cool and a great photographer and a great person. I want to be friends with you!!"

"Me too", chimes in Appl Juic.

"Also, you know I'm about to go on tour to Europe. I don't have a photographer. Why don't you come along? We'll have adventures, I'll pay you well, and you'll be our exclusive photographer. Plus you'll have a 1 month supply of beautiful European women at your call."

End scene.