Glamourous Giobs (Jobs)

Working for the US Census Bureau is exactly as glamorous as you'd imagine. When they told me I'd be training for 2 to 4 days before they got me up and running on reading manuals everyday or printing maps, I imagined it would be similar to how US Agent or Captain America trains. And I wasn't disappointed (by that, at least).

After navigating obstacle courses straight out the Danger Room, I memorized the names of a thousand forms and their purposes. After that, I was able to learn how to use a copier, which, by the way, runs on magic. Or are made of magic, as my fellow clerk told me. My computer based training, or CBT (because acronyms are awesome, apparently), showed me what an up arrow was, then told me it was for going up, while the down arrow should be clicked for the purposes of going down.

As mentioned earlier, a couple things have disappointed me. My supervisor is great, but he looks a lot like Jared Jeffries, and I constantly want to ask him how he's in the NBA without any discernible offensive talent. My manager reminds me of Ricky Gervais, but he never giggles, asks if I'm having a laugh, or says anything funny in a British accent. Finally, the map pouches which hold the maps that all operations are reliant on aren't really map pouches. I had imagined oil skin pouches, like something Lewis and Clark carried with them. Instead they're simply inter-office envelopes with maps inside. How commonplace! If the enumerators aren't frontiersman types like Davy Crockett decked out in a coonskin hats, but rather everyday people who enjoy counting, I think I may quit.